M'madera athu ndi chizolowezi kuganiza kuti ambiri mwa anyamata ali ndi zaka makumi awiri kale ali ndi chidziwitso chogonana. Komabe, izi sizili choncho kwa amuna onse, ndipo mnyamata akhoza kukhala namwali ngakhale pa 25, zomwe sizimulepheretsa kukhala wabwino, ndi kupambana. Sikuti atsikana onse ali okonzekera vutoli, ndipo ambiri sakudziwa choti achite ngati mwamunayo ali namwali.
Aliyense anayamba kugonana kwa nthawi yoyamba , koma ndi amuna amene amachita manyazi ndi umaliseche wawo, ndipo akuluakulu amakhala osowa kwambiri. Zikhoza kukhala ndi chidaliro chonse kuti moyo wokhudzana ndi kugonana kwa namwali uli mu zolembera zosalimba za mkazi wake woyamba. Kulingalira ndi kuchenjeza - izi ndi makhalidwe omwe ayenera kuwonetsedwa pochita ndi mnyamata wopanda chidziwitso chogonana. Musadabwe kumva kuti mnyamata wazaka 20 ali namwali, samangotenga.
Momwe mungadziwire mwamuna kuchokera kwa namwali?
Sizovuta, nthawi zambiri amuna oterewa ndi achikondi komanso osamvetsetseka, safuna kulankhula za nkhani za kugonana, musafunse "kapu" usiku woyamba.
Zomwe zimayambitsa umaliseche wamwamuna zingakhale zosiyana:
- Mnyamatayo amatha kugwirizana ndi malingaliro akuti kugonana popanda chikondi sikungatheke, choncho dikirani "nokha" ndi zomwe mukufuna, kuti mumupatse nokha;
- mwina, amuna ali ndi zovuta zokhudzana ndi kukula kwa mbolo , mawonekedwe ake, chifukwa cha kukhalapo kwa birthmark, chilonda;
- kudzidalira kungakhalenso chifukwa cha umaliseche wamwamuna, ngakhale kwa amuna omwe amadzidalira okha;
- Chifukwa china chosowa chidwi ndi kugonana. Mwinamwake mnyamatayu anali wotanganidwa kwambiri - ntchito, kuphunzira, masewera, zosangalatsa, ndipo sadali kwa atsikana;
- Zochitika zoipa m'mbuyomu zingathe kulepheretsa mnyamata kuti ayambe kugonana ndi mtsikana kachiwiri. Mwina msungwana wakaleyo adawonetsa mopanda nzeru, kapena anadodometsa mnyamatayo ndi kunyalanyaza kwake, ndipo izi zinali zopweteketsa mtima kwambiri moti sanayesere kuchita zambiri;
- Mnyamatayo akhoza kukhala mwana wamwamuna wa amayi. Kusamala kwambiri kwa amayi nthawi zambiri sikulola kuti munthu akhale wodziimira yekha, ndipo kulamulira kosalekeza nthawi zonse kumalepheretseratu.
Ndiye chochita chiyani ngati chibwenzi chanu ndi namwali, ndipo muli naye pabedi, kapena muli ndi njala kwa iye? Kugonana ndi namwali, yemwe ali ndi zaka 18-20 akhoza kukhala "pamlingo." Pambuyo pake, mahomoni a m'badwo uno akuwopsya, ndipo ngati munthu woteroyo wafika kale ku "zipatso zabwino", ndiye kuti ndithudi adzakhala wosasimbika pabedi. Koma pakadali pano ndi bwino kukumbukira malangizo ena:
- khalidwe la namwali amatha kutsimikizira kuti alibe chitetezo. Udindo wa mkazi ndiwothandiza kuthana nawo. Mnyamata ayenera kukhala wotsimikiza za chikondi chake, komanso kuti musasiye, ngakhale kuti kuyesa koyamba kugonana sikulephera;
- mulimonsemo simukumbukira za anzanu ena. Mnyamatayo akuopa kale kuti sadzakhala pamwamba, kuchokera kukumbukira koteroko kumangowonjezereka.
- momwe mungakondweretse mnyamata wamwali? Musamafulumire, perekani choyamba kwa iye, mumulole mnyamatayo asankhe kukupsompsona, kunyengerera, kupita kugonana;
- Sonyezani kuleza mtima, chifukwa njira zowonongeka zingayembekezere kudikira tsiku limodzi. Ingolankhulani za chikondi chanu, za zomwe mukufuna;
- ayenera kudziwa kuti mumakonda thupi lake, mukhale ofatsa, mumudandaule nokha. Koma ngati mwamunayo samvomereza kuti "wapatali kwambiri", musaumirire, chitani mosamala.
Pali zochitika pamene mnyamata ndi mtsikana ali anamwali. Pankhani iyi, musanayambe kuchita zachiwerewere, munthu ayenera kuphunzira bwino chiphunzitsocho, awerenge mabuku ofunikirawo. Ndibwino kuyamba ndi kugwirizanitsa, ndikugonana patangotha mausiku angapo pamodzi.