Ubale wopanda pake - zizindikiro ndi zotsatira

Chigawo chofunikira cha ubale uliwonse ndi chidaliro ndi ulemu kwa munthu aliyense. Kupezeka kwa zigawozi zikhoza kuyambitsa kuyanjana kwa uzimu chifukwa cha kudzikonda, kusamvetsetsana ndi chiwawa. N'zosavuta kudziwa munthu amene amachitira nkhanza, ndipo kukhala naye limodzi kungakhale kovuta komanso koopsa.

Abuz - ndi chiyani?

Mawu oti "kugwirizanitsa maubwenzi" adawoneka posachedwapa, kotero pali chifukwa chofunsira za mtundu wa chiyanjano ndi wozunza ndi ndani? Mawu akuti "abyuz" ali ndi mizu ya Chingerezi ndipo amamasuliridwa ngati "nkhanza", "chiwawa", "chipongwe". Abuzer ndi munthu yemwe amanyoza theka lake lachiwiri, amamupondereza, amanyengerera kapena amanyalanyaza zilakolako zake, zonyansa, zimayambitsa zochitika zina kapena kumunyoza.

Mu ubale wozunza, munthu wachiwiri adzakhala ngati wozunzidwa yemwe alibe ufulu wovota ndi nthawi kapena mwachangu kukumana ndi mavuto a maganizo kapena thupi kuchokera kwa mnzanuyo. Chifukwa cha malingaliro ake, wodwalayo akhoza kulekerera maubwenzi ozunza kwa nthawi yayitali, kuchititsa wozunza kuchita zachiwawa ndi chiwawa.

Abuz ali ndi mitundu iyi:

• chigamulo chobisala kapena chachinyengo pa wokondedwa wa ndondomeko ya maganizo;
• kuchitira nkhanza - kumenyana ndi munthu;
• kuchitiridwa nkhanza - kugwiriridwa kwa mnzanuyo kuti akhale paubwenzi wapamtima popanda zokhumba ndi thupi;
• kuchitira nkhanza zachuma - mnzawo akuyika kudalira kwathunthu pakuyang'anira chuma.

Kusokoneza Maganizo

Poganizira zomwe abyuz amakhulupirira, akatswiri ofufuza makamaka amamvetsera chiphompho cha maganizo. Chifukwa cha izi chikugwera chifukwa chakuti uwu ndiwo mtundu wofala kwambiri wa chiwawa mu ubale. Kuvutitsidwa kwa maganizo kumasonyezedwa poopseza, kunyozetsa, kumunyoza munthuyo . Bwenzi lake lauziridwa kuti iye ndi wopanda pake, wosasangalatsa, wopusa, wosakhoza kanthu. Maganizo amenewa amachititsa kuchepa kwa wokondedwa, kudziwoneka kwachisoni komanso kupsinjika mtima, kusakhutira kulankhula ndi anthu ena.

Chikondi chaumaganizo abyuz ali ndi mitundu iwiri ya mawonetseredwe:

1. Tsegulani abyuz . Abuzer akuwonetsa malingaliro ake olakwika pa satana ya moyo poyera pamaso pa anthu ena. Amatha kunena kuti wokondedwa wake ndi wopusa komanso wopanda pake, ali ndi makhalidwe oipa komanso makhalidwe oipa.
2. Abidz obisika . Abuzer ndi wolemekezeka kwambiri kwa wokondedwa wake pagulu, koma amanyenga mwachinsinsi. Iye nthawizonse amamuuza wokondedwa wake, amasonyeza kusakhutira ndi khalidwe lake, amasonyeza zolephera, amalankhula mawu okhumudwitsa, amachititsa manyazi.

Kugonana

Kuti mupeze tanthauzo lolondola la chomwe chili cholakwika, ndi kovuta kupeza mawu oyenera kuposa chiwawa. Kupanikizika kwa mnzanuyo kungadziwonetsere m'magulu onse, koma kusokonezeka kwa kugonana ndikumvetsa chisoni kwambiri kwa psyche. Mbali iyi ya maubwenzi aumunthu imafuna zokoma kwambiri ndi kumvetsetsa. Wozunza safuna kuganizira zosowa ndi chikhalidwe cha wokondedwayo, kumudziwa ngati chinthu chokhutiritsa zikhumbo zake zogonana.

Pa milandu 90, mwamuna ndi wogonana naye. Amalongosola khalidwe lake ndikuti mkazi ayenera kukwaniritsa udindo wake wa conjugal. Pokhala ndi chiwerewere, mkazi amakhala ndi zotsatira zofanana monga kugwiriridwa. Chiwawa cha mtundu umenewu chikhoza kukhala kwa zaka zambiri, monga momwe mkazi angakhalire osokonezeka maganizo, kusayanjanitsika kwa moyo, kusowa chidwi ndi zizoloŵezi za kudzipha.

Kusokoneza maubwenzi - zizindikiro

Nkhanza ndi zachiwawa, kotero ndi zophweka kuphunzira ubale wamtundu uwu. Mu ubale wozunza, njira zosiyanasiyana zingagwiritsidwe ntchito, cholinga chake ndi kunyozetsa ndi kunyoza umunthu wa wokondedwayo. Ubale wopanda pake uli ndi makhalidwe otere:

1. Nsanje . Wokondedwayo amayesetsa kuthetsa kulankhulana kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wake, makamaka pankhani yolankhulana ndi munthu yemwe si mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu.
2. Kufunsani mafunso . Wokondedwayo amafunanso nthawi zonse za zomwe wokondedwa wake akuchita, komwe anali komanso nthawi.
3. Miyambo . Kupepuka kwa munthu wozunza pazifukwa zilizonse kungabweretse mnzanu kudzipha, kusokonezeka kapena kupanikizika.
4. Malipiro . Mu ubale wozunza, mnzanuyo nthawi zonse amakhala ndi vuto lililonse kapena wolakwiridwayo.
5. Chifundo . Wopseza amakhumudwitsidwa pa nthawi iliyonse, ndipo gawo loyanjanitsa nthawi zonse likuyembekezeredwa kuchokera kwa mnzanuyo.
6. Kusintha kwa maganizo . Maganizo a wozunza angasinthe pa zifukwa zilizonse, nthawi zambiri motsogoleredwa ndi zolakwika ndi zachiwawa. Atatha kukhumudwa, amachedwa kuchepetsa, pamene mnzakeyo amatha kuthamangira kukhumudwa.

Zizindikiro za amuna a Abuzer

Pa milandu 90%, ozunza ndi amuna. Izi zimachitika chifukwa cha udindo waukulu wa amuna kwa zaka mazana ambiri komanso kukhalapo kwa mkulu wa testosterone hormone amene amachititsa nkhanza. Munthu wothandizira munthu amatha kudziwika ndi zizindikiro zotere:

• iye ali ndi zosiyana zosiyana kwa iyemwini ndi kwa wokondedwa wake: chimene iye samaloleza mkazi, iye amachiona kuti ndi chovomerezeka kwa iyemwini;
• Panthawi ya mgwirizano amagwiritsa ntchito kuwonjezeka kwa mawu, kulira;
• amasonyeza kupambana kwake, kuopseza ndi chiwawa;
• masamba okha pa malo osadziwika;
• amatsutsa mnzanu wa bodza, samasonyeza kuti amakhulupirira mawu ake;
• amayang'anira zokambirana za telefoni za wokondedwa, amayang'ana mauthenga;
• abyuzer-munthu ali ndi nsanje kwa munthu aliyense yemwe mnzanuyo amalankhulana naye. Ndibwino kuti azilankhulana bwino, nsanje yowonjezereka.

Abuzer-mkazi - zizindikiro.

Mu maubwenzi ozunza, ntchito yolakwika ikhoza kuyimba mkazi. Popeza iye ndi wofooka kuposa munthu mwathupi, wochitira nkhanza-mkazi amagwiritsa ntchito njira zina zowonetsera ndi kuzunza mnzake. Mu chida chake muli njira zoterezi:

• kukana ubale weniweni, kunyansidwa ndi mphamvu za kugonana kwa wokondedwayo;
• chiwawa chake chazimayi chimayang'aniridwa ndi zinthu za wokondedwa wake, amamenya mbale, zida, zovala zowonongeka;
• amayang'anitsitsa magawo onse a mwamuna kapena mkazi wake, amawatsogolera m'njira yoti anthu onse ozungulira amudziwe;
• Msonkhano uliwonse umayamba ndi kukafunsidwa kuti ndi ndani;
• osakhutitsidwa nthawi zonse ndi khalidwe la mkazi;
• mafunso ndi luso la wokondedwa, akutsutsa munthu.

N'chifukwa chiyani abyuzeryami?

Pali zifukwa zingapo zomwe munthu amachitira nkhanza. Zazikulu ndi izi:

• m'banja la makolo ake panali maubwenzi ozunza;
• wozunza anali kugwiriridwa kapena kugwiriridwa mwakuthupi kapena unyamata;
• Kudzichepetsa kwenikweni kwa abyuser, zomwe mosadziwa amayesa kuwonjezereka mwa kunyozetsa wina;
• matenda ndi matenda;
• zizindikiro za khalidwe: kusonyeza chikondi, kukwiya, kudzilamulira, kudziletsa kudziletsa, kudzikonda.

Mmene mungakhalire ndi wozunza?

Kusokoneza chiyanjano - ichi ndi chifukwa chake ziyenera kuthana ndi chiyanjano ndikuyesa kuyambitsa moyo watsopano. Munthu yemwe wakhala akuzunza sangathe kusintha khalidwe lake popanda kuthandizidwa ndi katswiri ndipo amaletsa manyazi mnzakeyo ndi kusonyeza kukwiya. Pamene wokondedwayo akuyesera kusintha ndi wolakwirayo ndipo sichimayambitsa mkwiyo wake, amachititsa kuti wozunza apite. Izi zimakhala zovuta kwa anthu onse a m'banja, choncho njira yabwino yothetsera vutoli ndi kusokoneza chiyanjano.

Kodi mungatani kuti musamachite nkhanza?

Munthu amene wakhala akuzunza, ndi zovuta kudzipangira nokha. Amaona kuti khalidwe lake likukakamizidwa, chifukwa cha khalidwe lolakwika la wokondedwayo. Chinthu choyamba chimene chiyenera kuchitidwa kuti musiye kukhala wankhanza ndiko kuzindikira vuto. Kusokoneza thupi, kugonana, kapena kuganiza kumakhala ndi zotsatira, zomwe ziyenera kukakamiza wogwiritsa ntchito kuganiza kuti akuchita chinachake cholakwika. Ayenera kumvetsa kuti chifukwa chachikulu chimakhala mwa iye mwini, osati mwa anthu oyandikana naye.

Pochotsa zizoloŵezi zawo zoipa, akatswiri a zamaganizo amavomereza kuti phompho likuganiza za mafunso awa:

1. Kodi ndi zinthu ziti zomwe zimayambitsa mavuto?
2. Chifukwa chachikulu cha khalidwe ili: kusokonezeka kwa ana, kudzichepetsa, kudzimana, zochitika zaumwini?
3. Kodi zotsatira za khalidwe lozunza ndi zotani?
4. Kodi mungachite chiyani mosiyana ndi zomwe zachitika?

Zotsatira za Abuza

Abuz ali ndi zotsatira zotsatirazi:

• kuphwanya maubwenzi ;
• kuwonjezereka kwa chiyanjano choyanjana ndi wina ndi mnzake;
• Kuonongeka kwa amayi pambuyo poti Abyuza ndizokhazikika ndipo zikugwirizana ndi kusakhumba kwa mkazi kuti apitirize kuyesetsa kuchita chirichonse ndi kutaya chidwi kwa moyo;
• kuchepa kwa kudzidalira nokha ndi chikhalidwe chopsinjika chomwe chimakhalapo kwa mnzanu yemwe wakhala akuchitidwa chiwawa;
• kuchepetsa chiyanjano kuti chikhale chochepa kapena chokwanira.

Mabuku okhudza abyuzers

Kuti mumvetse bwino nkhani ya nkhanza, nkoyenera kuwerenga mabuku okhudza abyuz:

1. Aud Dalsegg "Pa Khosi. Momwe mungathetsere bwalo la maubwenzi oipa . " Bukuli likufotokoza chifukwa chake anthu amagwiritsa ntchito chiwawa komanso momwe angapewere chiwawa chilichonse.
2. Lundy Bancroft "Chifukwa chiyani amachita izi?" . Mu mawonekedwe okondweretsa, mlembi akutiuza kuti wina sayenera kulekerera maubwenzi ozunza ndikuyesera kuwongolera.
3. Nancy Price, James Grant "Pa kama ndi mdani . " Zojambula izi zikufotokozera vuto la ubale wozunza, umene munthu wamkulu amayesa kuchotsa pa ululu wa imfa.

Mafilimu okhudza abyuzeryov

Mafilimu okhudzana ndi kugwirizanitsa maubwenzi ndi ochititsa chidwi poti amasonyeza maubwenzi awa pa zitsanzo za moyo. Mafilimu otchuka kwambiri ndi awa:

1. "Mfumu Yanga . " Pambuyo pa kuvulala, mkhalidwe waukulu ukuganiza momwe ubale wake ulili wathanzi ndi wokondedwayo.
2. "Mkazi wa Stalin . " Mu filimuyo, yomangidwa pa zochitika zakale, imauzidwa za abyuzere amene amaika zilakolako zake pakati pa maubwenzi.
3. "Maleficent" . Mu filimuyo, mu mawonekedwe a nthano, abyuse akufotokozedwa poyerekezera ndi heroine wamkulu, malingaliro ake ndi malingaliro ake pambuyo pake, komanso kuyesa kuchoka mu vuto la maganizo.