Kawirikawiri, amayi, otopa ndi maubwenzi osagonjetsa, omwe maziko ake anali malingaliro amoto, sankhani "koma iye, chikondi ichi, ndidzakwatirana ndi chiwerengero!". Koma kawirikawiri pa atsikana omwe adasankha kukwatirana molingana ndi kuwerengera, amawoneka, ngati kuti ali achinyengo, omwe alibe chopatulika, amatsukidwa ndichisangalalo chachikulu ndi miyala komanso amatchedwa mawu oipa. Kodi ndizolakwa zowonongeka kapena mphekesera zambiri, ndipo kukwatirana mosavuta ndi chinthu chotsiriza chomwe mkazi yekha amene sadzilemekeza yekha angathe kusankha?
Ukwati chifukwa cha chikondi kapena mosavuta?
Poyang'ana koyambirira, kugwirizana kwa mawerengedwe kumawoneka kosasangalatsa komanso kosiyana ndi kugonana komwe kunaperekedwa ndi mahule, kokha sitampu mu pasipoti. Koma izi ndizoyang'ana koyambirira, chifukwa ngati mutaganizira za izo, asungwana a zaka khumi ndi zisanu ndi zitatu okha amachititsidwa khungu chifukwa chakumverera ku ofesi ya olemba. Akazi achikulire amaganizabe ngati osankhidwa awo adzatha kupezera banja, ngati angasamalire mkazi wake ndi ana komanso ngati akufuna kuchita zimenezo. Ndipo musaganize kuti ichi ndi chikonzero cha amayi okhawo osaganizira komanso osakondweretsa, akwatibwi ambiri omwe ali ndi maso owala, asanakwatire, osayesa zokhudzana ndi zokhazokha, ndiye kuti amaganiza kuti "tidzakhala ndi moyo wotani ". Ndipo palibe kanthu mu malingaliro awa opanduka - simudzadzaza ndi chikondi. Komanso, pali nkhani zambiri pamene mukukwatirana opanda maganizo apadera, koma ndi chikhulupiriro cholimba kuti mwamuna adzakhala mwamuna wabwino, amayi atapita kanthawi amayamba kukonda naye. Kotero ukwati ndi kuwerengera sikulekanitsa chikondi, monga amakhulupirira.
Tsopano kuti tili otsimikiza kuti pafupifupi ukwati uliwonse umachokera kumaganizo osati mwachikondi mokondwera, tikhoza kukambirana za dongosolo lachikale laukwati mwa kuwerengera.
Wokwatiwa ndi kuwerengera - zopindulitsa ndi zamwano
Mwa mawu akuti "ukwati ndi kuwerengera" ndizozolowezi kumvetsa mapeto a mgwirizano waukwati ndi mapindu kwa onse awiri. Kawirikawiri ubwino umenewu umaperekedwa mu mgwirizano wa chikwati. Kodi moyo muukwati wotere umakhala wotani? Ndipo zonsezi zimadalira ngati mwaganiza zokwatira kokha chifukwa cha ndalama za mwamuna kapena iye ndi inu muli okongola. Gwirizanani, kukhala ndi munthu yemwe amakunyansidwa ndizovuta, ngakhale ngati mukukonzekera zakuthupi simudzakhala ndi manyazi. Komanso zimadalira kwambiri mgwirizano waukwati. Kawirikawiri amayi samawasamalira, kudalira akatswiri a mwamuna wam'tsogolo. Kotero musakhale osiyana, a lawyers akuitanidwa ndi mkazi wam'tsogolo, adzakhala pa malo oyambirira kuti aziwoneka zofuna zake, koma palibe amene amasamala za inu, mwinamwake, sangatero. Choncho, kukonzekera mgwirizano waukwati kuyenera kuyandikira mosamala kwambiri. Komanso, kukwatira chiwerengero, muyenera kukonzekera mfundo zotsatirazi muukwati:
- Kulamulira kwathunthu pa zochita za mkazi, chifukwa cha kuyenda kwake ndi oyanjana. Sichimangokhalira kukayikira kwambiri mwamuna kapena mkazi wake, koma ndi chikhumbo chotsimikiza kuti anawo adzakhala chimodzimodzi kuchokera kwa iye, osati kuchokera kwa barman yemwe adakopeka ndi mtsikana. Pachifukwa ichi, mkaziyo mwiniwakeyo amalepheretsa kuti asonyeze ndikuganiza, kupatulapo, zotsutsana sizinatchulidwe mu mgwirizano wa chikwati. Kawirikawiri, kulamulira koteroko kumatha pamene banjali limapeza mwana kapena chiwerengero choyenera cha olandira chololedwa mu mgwirizano.
- Mwinamwake kulowa mu "khola la golidi": Wokwatirana adzakupatsani zonse zofunika, koma simudzakhala ndi ufulu wosankha. Izi ndi chifukwa chakuti mwamuna amawona mkazi kukhala chimodzi mwa zofunikira zake, monga nyama yapamwamba - chakudya ndi chisamaliro ndizodziwonekera, koma ndani angayang'ane ndi chiweto? Inde, zochitika izi zikhoza kukhala ngati ndalama zonse zikuyikidwa m'manja mwa mwamuna.
N'kuthekanso kuti mwamuna kapena mkaziyo samawonekera m'masomphenya anu, nthawi zambiri pazinthu zamalonda ndikuchita misonkhano. Koma anthu ambiri amakonda izi - ngati ndalamazo pa khadi sizingathe.
Koma musaganize kuti chirichonse chiri choyipa, ngakhale muukwati wachikale mosavuta pali ubwino:
- Kupeza ndi mbali zonse za zofunidwa, ndipo, motero, kukhutira kwathunthu kumbali zonse ziwiri kuchokera ku mgwirizano wotero.
- Pano, chisankho cha kusokonezeka kwaukwati sichiphatikizidwa, kupatula pazifukwa zomwe zili mu mgwirizano.