Mu moyo wa munthu aliyense pali chikhalidwe cha chimwemwe. Kwa ena, ndi ntchito, ena amasangalala kukhala ndi denga pamitu yawo, ena samadziganizira okha popanda chuma. Koma ndi zovuta kufanizitsa chirichonse ndi kumverera pamene chikondi chofanana chimadza moyo. Amakumana ndi zosavuta, ndipo iwo omwe amatha kumvetsetsa kumverera kumeneku akhoza kuonedwa kuti ndi mwayi. Koma chochita chiyani kwa iwo omwe alibe mwayi wotsatizana nawo theka lawo lachiwiri? Makamaka kwa omwe amakayikira kuti pali chikondi chimodzi pa dziko lapansi ndipo nkhaniyi inalengedwa.
Kodi pali chikondi chimodzi?
Kawirikawiri kuti palibe chikondi, nenani omwe poyamba adatentha ndikumverera kotereku kumveka. Pambuyo pa zonse, ngati izo zokha zimabweretsa chimwemwe, ndiye iwo omwe ankakonda, koma osakondedwa, amayenera kukhala ndi vuto lenileni mu miyoyo yawo. Palibe choipa kuposa kupambana kwa wokondedwa. Komano, m'magulu amakono, lingaliro lofanana ngati chikondi chenicheni chofanana chakhala chochepa kwambiri. Maukwati anayamba kukhala ndi phindu, ndalama ndi malo apamwamba, komanso ndi mwambo kunena "pa ntchentche." Chikondi monga kugwirizana chinasiya kuchitika mwa mawonekedwe ake oyera. Koma komabe kulipo. Ndipo kuti muyankhe funso la momwe mungakwaniritsire chikondi, nkofunika kutenga zofunikira ziwiri: kuphunzira momwe mungadzikondere nokha ndi zovuta zanu zonse ndi zofooka zanu, ndi kuchotsa zolakwika zomwe anthu onse amamva zomwe zimakhala ndi chiyanjano.
Kodi mungakope bwanji chikondi?
Pafupifupi aliyense amene adadzifunsa yekha kuti: "Ndikufuna chikondi," sikuti amapereka lipoti lochokera ku kuya kwa moyo. Kodi mungadzichitire bwanji ndikutsutsa ndikudikirira kuti wina adzakukondani ziribe kanthu?
- Ndicho chifukwa chake chinthu choyamba muyenera kuyamba ndi kudzikonda nokha, thupi lanu ndi makhalidwe anu. Dziwani nokha kuti ndinu wapadera komanso osapindulitsa. Wina akhoza kugwedezeka ndi kumwetulira kwanu, koma nthawi zonse mumakhala wokhumudwa. Wina angakonde thupi lanu, ndipo mumabisala ndi hoodies ndi zovala zosaoneka bwino. Chotsani zitsulo zamakono, ndipo mudzawona kuti pafupifupi aliyense adalengedwa mwachikondi.
- Mawu akuti chikondi ndi amodzi okha si owona nthawi zonse. Ndipo nthawi zina, mosiyana ndi malingaliro, kuti munthu athe kumvetsetsa bwino, ayenera kuyamba kuphunzira momwe angakonde, popanda kuyembekezera chilichonse. Chikondi nthawi zonse chimakhala chowawa. Koma pofuna kubwezeretsa, nkofunika kuti tikwanitse kutenga, kukhululukira, kulekerera ndi kuyembekezera.
- Ngati tikanakhala pakhomo ndikudikirira chikondi ichi kuti tibwere, tikhoza kukhala ndi ukalamba kwambiri popanda kukhala ndi chibwenzi. Mukufuna kukondedwa? Ndiye musati mubise pakhomo pansi pa rugudu ndi bokosi la chokoleti ndi nkhani yachikondi. Tulukani mu kuwala. Onetsani dzikoli kukongola kwake ndi umunthu wake. Ndipo posachedwa padzakhala wina yemwe adzawona ndi kuyamikira zonsezi.
- Kupeza munthu amene mumamukonda pambali pake, musamangokhala pamutu pake ndipo musapemphe chilolezo chachikondi chilichonse. Choncho, funso la momwe tingadziwire ngati chikondi ndi mgwirizano sichidzathetsedwe. Khalani wokondedwa, chithandizo ndi chithandizo. Dzipereke nokha chifukwa cha iye ndi nthawi yake, mwa zochita zake, iwe mwiniwe udzamvetsa momwe iye aliri wokondedwa. Koma musaiwale kuti kuyamikira kwanu nthawi zonse mu chikondi, masamu-ki ndi kuyesayesa
kukambirana za maubwenzi kungathetsere mnzanu kuchokera kwa inu. - Kumbukirani kuti wokondedwa ali ndi ufulu wa ufulu. Mbalame sizithawa pakhomo lotseguka. Choncho musamusunge munthuyo, ndipo ngati amakukondani, koma osati kubwerera, komanso osasiya.
Chikondi choyenera chiyenera kukhala chiyanjano. Koma ngati mukudziwotcha nokha ndikumakumana ndi munthu yemwe sakufuna kuyankha maganizo anu, gwiritsani ntchito vutoli monga chitsanzo chogwira ntchito pa zolakwitsa. Musakwiyire anthu omwe sali okondana ndi inu, dziyeseni nokha ndipo wina adzakuwuzani mawu achikondi omwe mwakhala mukuyembekezera kwa nthawi yaitali.